After yet another glorious Monday as an underpaid, underappreciated, oft-maligned, can’t-get-no-respect graduate student, I thought I’d take a quick moment to jot down the things as of late that have been mightily pissing me off. All those who have hate in their hearts are henceforth encouraged to revel in my distaste for all those around me.
Reason No. 239482374 Why I Hate People
Texting in class. I hate it equally if I’m the one teaching or just in it. It’s the epitome of disrespect. I know you’re all So Very Very Important that your social matters can’t wait until class is over, but please. Do everyone around you a favor and shut off your goddamn phone.
Reason No. 345984234 Why I Hate People
Not paying attention while walking. This includes crossing streets , walking through hallways, up stairs, anywhere on campus, really. Again, STFU GET OFF YOUR FUCKING PHONES, PEOPLE. JESUS. If I am being inconvenienced because your slow ass is blocking the stairs because you are TEXTING, I will shove past you. Hard.
Reason No. 4325987 Why I Hate People
Unprepared students. This one I just can’t figure out. I email my classes EVERY weekend to tell them SPECIFICALLY what they need to do for the upcoming week, and in-FUCKING-evitably, a good handful of them show up going, “Duuuuurrrrrrr?!” I do not understand. You really must TRY to be this inept.
Reason No. 1234098 Why I Hate People
Lack of intellectual curiosity/disdain for those who have it. The proverbial straw that broke this bitchy camel’s back today. I mean, really. The last time somebody made me felt bad for contributing in class discussion was in high school. DIAF for making me upset for even one nanosecond that I have a brain, and plz don’t be surprised when I try even harder to make you hate me. Luuuuuuuuuuuuuuuvya! :D
Let my bitterness flow over you like a soothing balm. That’s right, people. Let the hate in.
Ok, so I think maybe I could have written this post. You and I could swap teaching stories. I taught Theory I last fall to a bunch of musical theatre majors. MUSICAL THEATRE!!!!! AUUUGGGHHH!!! I think I must have sent them five e-mails a week telling them what their assignments were, and they still had no idea. Unprepared? That’s what these people should have been getting a degree in. My favorite was the day that I had a meeting with a girl to talk about why she was always late to class, and she started by saying, “Why do I need to be on time?” I wanted to bang my head against the wall. Special times. Ok, enough whining-I need to get back to practicing, so I’m not unprepared, ha ha! BTW, loved your wedding pics. Congrats again! Hilary
Oooh, I can add a couple more to this list:
Students who walk sidewalks in packs — walking three astride, completely oblivious that others exist and those others may not want to trod through the mud/street. I admit, early last Fall, I came across one such pod, lowered my shoulder, and went to town. Then, screamed at them like a crazy bitch. It was fun
Students who apparently never learned how to appropriately dress in public — boys with their jeans situated around their knees and boxers exposed are, of course, the perennial classic. Girls who wear tights as pants are now strolling down the road the road of poor choices. And today in the library, I saw a girl wearing one of those light tissue tees, essentially see-through, with no undershirt/cami underneath. Just a bra. Really??
[...] to discover that those who read this blog are just as cold and black of heart as I–my “Miss Misanthrope” post was the most popular by a long shot. At any rate, this email prompted me once again to [...]